On the Inside

I'm totally traumatized right now; I feel like the worst person in the whole world. This is one of those instances that is only significant to you, even though it's small compared to other people. Looking at my last post, it seems quite insignificant. This doesn't change the fact that I want to crawl under a rock and shy away from the sun today.

I graded undergraduate papers for the first time.

It's emotionally hard for me to judge the efforts of other people. Many of these people have decent ideas, but they lack the ability to express them clearly. I can tell some people tried very hard to construct a good paper and failed in the process. I'm imagining people crying in their dorm rooms because they put in so much effort into their paper and feel helpless against my tyrannical grading style.

Of course, I tried to err on the side of generosity. Some fellow TAs grade harshly to an extreme. Also, my professor set a 'B' as a solid paper. If I had the option, I'd give everybody an 'A,' like we can do in graduate school. Despite all this, there's something unsettling about wielding my new-found academic privilege and having to give people harsh grades in the process. I'm on the inside of this process now and I don't like looking out.

I hold writing workshops throughout the quarter. One can only hope that people take advantage of the opportunity.