Never Never

Have you ever had one of those moments when you grow up a bit? You think to yourself, "Wow, I think, from now on, things will be just a bit different than they were before. Yet, this difference isn't action or denial, it's due to a different way of looking at the world. The ways things were just were not good enough."

I had one of those moments. It wasn't life altering or anything. I was simply taking fresh sheets back from the laundry room, passing down my pink hallway in my purple dress socks. Suddenly, I realized that I knew too much about a recent situation. I mean, I had been unhappy for the last few days just because I knew too much. The world is really pretty damn messed up, a lot of it's due to people not stopping to think. I had recently caught wind of a series of disturbing events which would eventually turn back and cause quite a few problems. Unethical decisions, lack of competence, self-serving machinations... all going on without the other people knowing. They just went on their unhappy way, creating a mess.

Damn me, being an ENTP, forced into putting together the big picture. I couldn't help but take a moment and trying to figure out why things were going so... horribly, even though people weren't even talking to eachother about the problems. They just stayed in their little space and wondered why things kept getting progressively worse. After hearing a bit of the story, I knew what was coming around the corner, and it wasn't pretty.

...And for the first time, I used the early warning to run for cover. I'm tired of 'kicking the world and breaking my foot,' as a wise-person once said. I think it's time to use my leadership skills for my own benefit for a couple years. I should focus on becoming a better person, rather than focusing on making the world around me conform to my visions.

At least for a while (hopefully longer) I'm focusing on the simple things in life. I once heard a valuable piece of advice that I only half-understood before: 'If you're searching for that special someone, you have to be proactive. Make a list of all the traits you like in a person... then start doing them yourself. You shouldn't have to search far for that person you like. That person should be right there in the mirror.' I think I could deal with improving the lives of myself and those around me. I think one can lead an exemplary life just by being a good, honest individual.

It's more than many people can say.
I think wisdom is the slow process of getting tired of things.